Transracial adoptive parents subjected to torrents of criticism.
I recently joined a Facebook group devoted to transracial adoption. I thought that by joining I would meet and have enlightening and fulfilling discussions with like-minded people across the globe on the subject. I also thought it would be a good platform to attract readers to my blog which is on parenting and, occasionally, when the topic calls for it, the fact that my husband and I are white and our children are black and adopted. The old adage of being careful of what you wish for is ringing so loudly it threatens to drown out the maxed-out volume of our home.
The transracial adoptions group is large, with over 6,000 members, based predominantly in the United States. My request to join was accepted and I was told to read the pinned post and then spend at least 48 hours reading past postings to get a feel for the group. I read the pinned post then introduced myself and added a link to a blog I wrote six months ago on our journey to adopt our first child. I immediately received comments and feedback, all positive, with many queries regarding the differences in SA/US terminology, procedures, etc. Then I was rapped over the knuckles, put firmly back in my box and instructed not to engage again until I had done the 48-hour homework.
So I did – and was flabbergasted: I was totally out of tune with a community I had thought would be caring and sharing. Instead, I found my American counterparts so sensitive to the issue of race as to border on the ludicrous. They seemingly have a need to label everyone.
A very serious query was posted asking if members would take offence at the acronym WAP (Whte Adoptve Parent).
Little Sarah comes home from ballet super-excited: the recital theme is The Jungle Book and she wants to be a monkey. Mm explains in her very best children's vocabularythat she cannot be a monkey. You would truly believe these people are under constant racial attack ... with radars scanning every millisecond for a real or perceived slur.